This is inspired by a post on one of the blogs that I follow who posted this here.

In this post I’d like to talk about a couple of things.

First I go over cords because this is all done through the cords. From my understanding, at the beginning of a relationship, most of the dating dance is done in the subtle realms. The physical realms help a lot, of course, however, the energy is potent and can make or break a relationship in my opinion.

The second part is an example of how the dance works. This post is written from a heterosexual point of view, but can be applied to any mixture of gender and couples. It’s all energies, frequencies, and connections.

Next week’s post will be about managing these energetic cords in healthy ways.

It seems to me that there is an energetic sensitivity that occurs between two people dancing the date dance. Every so often I’ve seen it in my head:

Myself and the man are walkie talkies set to our own frequency. Then we go out on a date together which shows us if our frequencies can match each other, if we can talk a similar language, if we can hear each other. Its a dance that comes to an end it seems when we part ways. But then, our frequencies have become attuned to each other. After that point, whether we know it or not, our subconscious and conscious ways of being will effect the result of that date. 

A Brief Lesson On Cords

Even though we are not in each others physical company we still have an energetic cord that has been created. This cord runs from me to him and him to me. It keeps us in tune with each other. And its often subconscious. This is why people say that if you think of someone often they are probably thinking about you. Or why your intuition can tell you more about a person in silence than when your with them.

Because of the cord that has been created you can tune into that person and feel what they are feeling. You get the inside scoop on what is going on for them. Which is probably why women always know when a man is cheating – its whether or not they want to admit it. We can feel where they are putting their time and energy. We are built for it.

But don’t worry men, you can tune into women as well we can tune into you. I’ve dated men who will take the time to tune into me, and I have to admit to you, its a huge selling point for me in a man.

Both parties in a relationship have the same access to the cord that connects you two.

Lets be clear about one thing about these cords: These cords run between you and other people ALL THE TIME.

The deeper and more intimate the relationship the stronger/bigger the cords is. The less depth to the relationship the less the cord is there. Cords are created between you and your family members, friends, work mates, team mates, the barista you received coffee from today, the beggar on the street… Absolutely everyone!

Cords are part of a natural process of life that allows us to develop deeper connections with those we desire to and to stay tuned into those people. The people that after several months of not talking to we want to call up and say “Hey” or the people that pop into our heads. “I needed to call George because I felt like something was wrong. It turns out that he had a terrible fall the other day and just got out of the hospital.”

Healthy cords allow us to feel connected and supported within the web of people that we know. We are in a constant state of giving and taking energetically. The cords allow the energy we need to come to us and the energy others need to be gifted to them in this constant flux.

Unhealthy cords create unhealthy tendencies in relationships. Some examples of these behaviours are the following:

• an unhealthy obsession will occur
• one person inside the relationship will be constantly fatigued (or if a person has several cords connecting in unhealthy ways then that person might be constantly tired)
• a codependent relationship may occur
• or a person will be almost addicted to another person.

It is because of the cord that is developed on a date that a sensitivity to another person is developed. The person at the other end of the cord can literally feel what you are putting out there. Are you putting out a desperate vibe? Are you putting out a i-liked-him-had-a-great-night-will-trust-that-he-calls-me-goes-about-my-day-vibe?

Whichever vibe you are feeding is what he will feel through the cord that connects the both of you.

And he will match his response to that vibe.

Just as you will match your response to his vibe.

In my experience, this is how unhealthy people enter into a relationship with other unhealthy people while healthy people attract healthy people.

If the frequency you put off when you are away from that person matches their blueprint (the way that perceive and function in relationships) that person will generally pursue the relationship.

An Example

I go on a date with a man and we match well. I feel really connected to him, and I feel the night has gone amazing. We may have even shared a kiss! When he drops me off, he says, “I’ll call you tomorrow.” I say, “Please do.” with a grin, and leave on a high.

If I am in an unhealthy state of mind I might be obsessively checking my phone, allowing whether or not he calls me to affect my mood. I may obsess for a few days before taking action and doing something about it. Perhaps I have been thinking about him non-stop. I may not be focused on what I am doing because I am so focused on him. Maybe even stop doing what I need to do because this has affected me so much.

The man feels this when he thinks about me. That’s all he has to do in order to tune into my energy. The more aware he is the more conscious information he will receive, however, he will still receive information in the subtle realms and respond appropriately for his blueprint.

If he is operating a healthy state of mind most likely in that extreme scenario he would not be interested in pursuing the relationship further. If he is in an unhealthy state of mind he would probably pursue the relationship as long as he felt that it could match the blueprint he holds for his relationships.

If I am in a healthy state of mind the next day then I would find myself not obsessing, but curious and open. I would be doing what I need to do with the glow of the possibility of new love. I would have patience to let it grow as it will grow and to nurture it into something.

There is a lack of attachment that the unhealthy state of mind often has – an attachment to fulfilling oneself in some way instead of allowing the relationship to be the cherry on to of an already fulfilling life.

A man operating from an unhealthy state of mind might pursue me but find himself quickly rejected due to the blueprint of what I perceive a healthy relationship. A man operating from a healthy state of mind might pursue me and we might find that even if the relationship doesn’t continue as lovers that we can be in relationship to each other in healthy ways.

That, to me, is the energetic dance of dating.

It’s something to think about and be aware of, but not something obsess over. It’s something to witness inside of yourself and consciously make choices about what kind of frequency you put out to increase the probability of what you desire coming true.

Think beyond just relationships with lovers. This is a micro view of a macro. This is a pattern that holds true for all areas of life. The frequency you put out will attract that in the subtle realms.

And its all learning.

Stay tuned for next weeks post on healthy ways to manage your cords.